Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Mayor Bronconnier's pre-election pitch

Calgary Mayor Dave Bronconnier has officially launched his re-election campaign with a letter to each Calgary taxpayer, paid for by the taxpayers and received with their property tax notice.

Read the letter here. (It's a photocopy of a photocopy, scanned - so not the best quality)

Clearly the letter is designed to drive a wedge between Calgarians and the provincial government by abdicating any responsibility the Mayor has as a leader, and to direct any anger Calgarians have about traffic, police or anything else at the provincial government.

But if this over-the-top letter is the one he sent to everyone, I wonder kind of letter Bronconnier sent to his campaign backers, volunteers and supporters...

I imagine that letter would go something like this:


"Dear campaign team,

Good news! Remember how we were all concerned traffic delays, crime, and deteriorating roadways might hurt my future electoral chances? Not to worry, I've found a solution - and potentially a new slogan for the campaign.

Ready for it... "It's not my fault, it's the province's fault"

I know what you're thinking, and yes it is true I appeared all chummy with now-Premier Ed Stelmach him during the leadership race, but you guys all know that was just because I jumped the gun thinking Calgary's own Jim Dinning was going to win.

But so did most of you. Remember that meeting when the team decided I needed to try to beat Kevin Taft to the punch and set myself up as Dinning's number one nemesis?

Anyways, not to worry, I found a small loophole in the free money Stelmach promised me, and I'm back on track by suggesting it was the "the biggest lie every perpetrated on Calgarians."

And I've been practicing saying it in front of a mirror just to make sure I don't bust out laughing when I hear myself say something so out-landish.

Well, best get back to work. Working on a new way to increase taxes - wish me luck!

Yours truly,

Premier Mayor Dave Bronconnier

P.S. Actually, scratch that slogan. How about "Calgary wants in!"
Yeah, let's go with that one instead. "

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